Out Of The Mouths Of Babes

By Susan Preston | March 12th, 2012 at 2:27 pm

Whether you realize it or not, you are setting an example for your children! I am sure many of you reading this have heard of and may have even used it yourself, right ” Out of the Mouth of Babes!” Would what comes out of your child’s mouth embarrass you? Children are like sponges; they absorb everything that you say. They are also modeling after you, how you behave, how you treat yourself, others and even how you treat them.

Speaking of right out of the mouth of babes, I have a funny story to tell you. When my stepdaughter was 4 years old, I took her to Food Lion one night and as we were in line to check out, the cashier left the register to do a price check. Aj said to me, “Susan why is it taking them so long?” I said to her, “Sweetie, life can be one big wait at times.” With that, she said, why don’t you marry my dad, then?” I said, “He hasn’t asked me, yet.”

She then put her little hand on her hip and looked at me straight in the eyes and said, “You might as well be, you’re living with him.” Oh my goodness, my face turned beat red, as there was now a long line of people behind us that heard her, lol. Just for the record, her father did propose not long after and we never stayed in the same room while the girls were there overnight, as they came to visit every other weekend <grin>. Needless, to say, she heard that from somewhere;)

This past weekend my husband and I went to the grocery store. As we were coming out of the store, there was a mother who was walking ahead of us with her little boy. She was going so fast that he couldn’t keep up with her. All of a sudden, she said to him in a very mean tone, “Hurry up, we have to go!” The poor little boy was going as fast as he possibly could. Imagine how that little guy must have felt? What kind of message are you sending to your child?

I remember when my stepdaughter was 5 years old; she was playing with one of her baby dolls. Out of the blue, she started scolding her in a certain tone. My husband and I looked at each other, like where did that come from, as we didn’t speak to her like that. Remember, she didn’t live with us; she only came every other weekend to visit.  Need I say more? What tones you use and how you say something to your child makes an impression on them.

Everything you say or do is being modeled by your child, grandchild, etc.  How you treat yourself and others is equally as important. You want to be kind and compassionate to others.  Making yourself a priority rather then an option sends your child a strong message, that in order to give and share, we must first take care of ourselves. As your child sees you doing so they will be inclined to do the same. Think of it in this way, whatever you do is going to be modeled!

9 Ways To Make Your Behavior & Relationships Worthy of Being Modeled:

1. Always speak kind and loving words to your child as well as to others.

2. Treat them and others with love, honor, respect, kindness, compassion, etc.

3. If you disagree with someone discuss it in private, but remember to never, ever belittle them.

4. Make sure words like, “Thank You”, “You’re Welcome”, “Please”, “I Appreciate You”, “I’m Sorry”, and  “Please Forgive Me”, are all at the top of your vocabulary list.

5. Help others to feel they are more then enough! Help to build them up rather than to tear them down.

6. Give and share the best you!

7. Give praise when someone deserves it.

8. Listen attentively without interrupting.

9. Forgive graciously. Let them know that we all make mistakes including you.

Most of all make sure your child is hearing your loving voice. Make them feel that they are special, that you value them. Let them know in your actions, that they are a significant part of your life. Enjoy them, love them and help them to grow and be the ‘BEST’ that they can be! Show them that they are more then enough! Remember to tell them how much you love them and just how proud of them you are. Also, telling a child that you believe in them is huge! I know, because I was not told that as a child. Trust me, they grow up very quickly. Lastly, don’t be afraid to tell your child that you were wrong about something. Letting them know that you aren’t perfect, it helps them to realize that they don’t have to be either.

 

Susan Preston is a Relationship Consultant as well as a Mindset Motivator specializing in helping you to master yourself so that you can that have Extraordinary Relationships.. With her unique philosophy, Susan helps you to discover your true magnificence and how to embrace it. She will provide you with all the necessary tools to successfully bring out the best in your relationships starting with your mindset.

Visit Susan’s website  http://susancanhelpme.com/

Are you having relationship problems now? Or maybe you can’t move forward in another area of your life…Susan would like to help. Click on “Free Consultation” and she will gladly give a free 30 minute consultation to answer any pressing questions that you may have.

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  • http://www.myyogasecret.com Rhonda Uretzky

    Whoever said “children learn what they live” was so right…and parents are the first people who show them how to live life. Your kids are a mirror into your own behavior, not only when they are young but later, when they are grown. Parenting is an awesome responsibility and also a great joy.

  • http://NormaDoiron.NET/ Norma Doiron @Learning to LIVE Healthy, Wealthy & Wise

    Susan, this is so true. I’ve seen adults ask children to “do as I say and not as I do.” I’ve heard adults curse every second word, but if they realize they’ve done it in front of a child go, “ooops! sorry. Didn’t realize there were kids here.” It always makes me wonder where it says that at a certain age it is all right to swear in front of someone? Hmmmm… food for thought. Personally, I find it brings out the worst in people. Thanks for sharing, my beautiful friend! x0x The LEARNED Preneur @ NormaDoiron.Net

  • http://www.MissingSecretToParenting.com denny hagel

    Wonderful article and stories! When parents come to me for help the first order of business is to get them to look at themselves…the key to successful parenting is in examining our own mindset in order to be the best we can be. The key to our children’s success is firmly rooted in our own ‘parenting mindset’ Thanks for sharing your wisdom and insights!

  • http://www.suegraber.com Sue

    Absolutely love this and can relate with my little 3 year old grandson… So amazing when you hear words come out of his mouth, mostly very positive, that he is repeating from his mommy and daddy. I just have to laugh and also realize just how much “little ears and eyes are watching.” Thanks for the great post!

  • http://www.sherievenner.com Sherie

    Modeling is a very critical strategy for children and the advice you give, Susan, for great modeling is absolutely key! I agree with you that our children and grandchildren are like little sponges, so we must provide ourselves as a good role model…it is how they learn! Love it, great post, Susan!

  • http://www.wow101.com Alexandra McAllister

    I really enjoyed this article! Yes, we never know what will come “Out of the mouth of babes!” I did get a chuckle reading about your stepdaughter. They see everything! Your 9 tips are great, especially, #8 “Listen attentively without interrupting.” Thank you so much!

  • http://www.anitafiander.com Anita

    Great and insightful post. I worked in child protection for 15 years and one area of focus was parenting..of course I have my own 3 children as well. A topic that is evergreen for sure! We need to continue to improve our parenting skills…our children and grandchildren are the biggest resource we have. I will be sharing on Twitter :)

  • http://www.memarketingservices.com Mandy Edwards

    Wonderful post! Having 2 small daughters I try to stay aware of what I say!

  • http://www.pristineperception.com Suzanne Jones

    This is speaking to many. If someone wants to know what their own child feels like, go back in your memory to a time when you felt sorry for a child because of the way his/her parent was speaking to them. We often don’t realize what we are doing ourselves because we are so close to it…

  • http://gretchenpritts.com Gretchen Pritts

    Great reminders and information Susan. Thanks for sharing. It is so important to be our best self, so kids have permission to be theirs :)

  • http://ronaejull.com Ronae Jull

    So many good points here! I especially appreciated your point about not being afraid to admit imperfections to our children, which sends them the message that they don’t have to be perfect either. Very important!

  • http://SusanCanHelpMe.com Susan Preston

    Thank you, everyone for these Amazing comments. I appreciate each of you. I am so honored and grateful to have been asked by Dr. Joe to do a guest post. Thanks, Dr. Joe. I hope that you are all enjoying your weekend :)

    • Dr Joe

      Susan it has been great having you as a contributor. Look forward to having another article soon :)